I've mentioned this before. Every Friday, I take some time, usually in the morning, to run through a mental-health check-in. It's something that I've done consistently for two years now, and, for me, this check-in is an essential building block for healthy goals/relationships/quality of life.
Often, I am not motivated enough to practise this discipline for myself. However, I've come to understand that taking care of my brain is essential for my family's health and happiness. The day that I understood how my poor mental health was hurting my kids was the day I committed to getting better: for them.
Being strong mentally involves many different pieces. Feelings Friday is just one, but I thought I would share a bit of my method with you in hopes it may give you some direction and insight. So here it goes.
#1 Fast, visual journaling of what happens every day.
I use the Daylio app to create a record of events during my day and my mood. I fill it out every night at around 9 pm, and the exercise usually takes under a minute. A single sentence in a daily journal would be comparable. It can be hard to remember everything that happened over a week, and a fast daily record can help.
#2 Feelings Friday
This scheduled event is written on the calendar. It takes priority over anything else that I may want to get done. It is not something to be done 'between' or in your 'free time.' It is the thing that you are doing this morning. I make space for Feelings Friday by taking a break from my morning 20-minute workout. I trade my physical exercise for mental. Both are equally important.
#3 Depression and Anxiety Tests
These tests are the same ones your doctor will give you to understand how you are doing mentally. They reflect a basic standard of care used by the medical profession in BC, Canada. They are based on the work of Dr. David Burns: a pioneer of Cognitive Behaviour Therapy.
I fill out my answers by reflecting on the past week and referring to my daily mood journal to remember my ups and downs.
#4 Chart the results.
I wanted to measure my progress, so I made this chart by blending some data from Dr. Burns together. It's not entirely accurate, but it helps me measure things over time. Over the years, I've made notes on my charts about things like medication change or significant events, and I have been able to measure the impact of these events on my health.
#5 Journal
I reflect on the past week through journaling. By this point, I usually have identified any struggles to be addressed.
#6 Make a plan
Suppose I don't have the resources I need to address a problem. In that case, I make a plan: like contacting my doctor, reading a trusted resource on therapy techniques, planning a day of rest and self-care, or just facing up to a problematic situation that I've been avoiding so I can get it off my plate and move on.
So yep. This is what I've been doing for years. Having concrete steps to work through each Friday really helps me to focus. Hopefully, my experiences can help you too!
Also! Even if you don't work through all the steps, taking the time to fill out the depression/anxiety tests can give you a fair idea of how you're doing and if it's time to reach out for help. Many of us normalize our suffering and don't realize that constant misery doesn't HAVE to be our reality. Feeling upset by troubling events is normal. Living in a consistent state of anxiety and sadness isn't. Even in times of hardship and struggle, there is joy to be found. You can be happy again.
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